When I was growin’ up in west Texas, I saw a lotta men cut down in a hail of lead and fire because they couldn’t make a decent biscuit. I decided at an early age that was not gonna happen to me. So I bought myself a Russian-made 12 gauge, double barreled shotgun (side by side with exposed hammers) and a surplus flak jacket. I shortened the barrels and the stock on the scatter gun and set out a searchin’ for a damned good biscuit recipe. ‘Bout ten miles south of Grinders Switch, Tennessee, I found it! While robbin’ an old lady outside a Piggly Wiggly, I noticed she had something far more valuable than just money in her purse… As she was handin’ me the last $16 of her Social Security check, she dropped her grandma’s biscuit recipe. I think she was more upset about the recipe than the money—I don’t blame her.
- 1/4 cup of shortening
- 2 cups self-rising flour
- 1/2 tablespoon sugar
- 1 teaspoon salt
- 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
- 3/4 buttermilk
Heat oven to 450 degrees.
Combine dry ingredients then cut in shortening.
Stir in buttermilk so the dough leaves the side of the bowl and rounds into a ball.
Turn dough onto a lightly floured surface. Knead lightly about 10 times (fewer times the fluffier and lighter the biscuits will be). Roll or pat dough 3/4 inch thick.
Cut with floured biscuit cutter-approximately 2 1/2 inch diameter.
Place in ungreased cast-iron skillet and cook for about 12 minutes or until light golden brown.
Serve with a shot of a nice plastic bottle tequilla, apply Vicks Vaporub to your eyelids and do some line dancing.
Submitted by Wesley S. graphical interface and communications director of all media Freeman